Are You Frustrated?

Just the other day I was asked a simply compelling question.

Do you ever get frustrated?

I had to think for a moment. No, not because I can't remember if I ever get frustrated. I get frustrated, angry, annoyed, discombobulated, out-of-sorts, reticent and fed up. I can list examples of each and examples for those examples, indicating just when and where I have allowed the cold embrace of each to direct my actions. Experiencing those feelings was not the issue.

What I was reluctant to do was admit to those feelings. As a Christian, as a pastor, were such human emotions allowed to spring forth and even more importantly to which I should admit?

Of course they are. But in many circles today it is expected that such feelings should be squelched. Push them down as far as you can until they have to look up to see the sole of your show, then never, ever admit to such evil desires! To which I say poppycock. Or pish-posh. Or ridiculous. Pick your generational favorite.

Frustration, anger and all the others are natural human emotions. It is not for us to be required to live in their total absence. They will pop up from time to time. Admitting to their existence is no crime. God does not want us to exist as robots with no emotions. But He does tell us what to do when such emotions become overwhelming.

1 Peter 5:7 gives us those instructions. "Cast all your anxiety upon him because he cares about you" (NIV). Take out anxiety and replace it with any of the other words. Frustration. Annoyance. Anger. God does not expect us to be perfect in our emotions. He does expect us to know what to do with them.

So yes, I have gotten frustrated. I have been frustrated time and again. But I have learned that in those times of frustration is when I need to call out to God. I call out to Him and beg Him to cover that frustration with His grace. And He has never failed to provide.   

Because I Said So

Because I said so.

How many of us heard that as children - or even adults - and wondered to ourselves "what kind of explanation is that?" The response might have befuddled us yet we had no recourse from lack of age or experience, and took it for what it was meant to be - an order and an end to the conversation.

From a human perspective this answer can be quite frustrating. "Because I said so" does not quell the litany of questions that arise. "Who are you and what are your qualifications to make such a proclamation?", "Is there special insight that you have that I don't?" and "Do you have the power to enforce this reasoning once you've made it?" are just a few.

Now when it comes to parents and children, for the most part we can reconcile that the parent have (or at least should have) more knowledge, common sense and experience to make the proper informed decision that is best. Again, this is a generality - there are always exceptions that prove the rule. But what about when a peer gives this reasoning? Are we not more inclined to raise an eyebrow at that person, questioning both their reasoning and their opinion of whom they directed their comments? It is safe to conclude that when presented with such rationale we find it hard to converse again with such obvious stubbornness.

But what if God used such reasoning? Why would do that you may ask? Well, one look no further than Job to find such an occurrence. After torment and terror was rained down on this righteous man, and after all manner of friends had come by to try and support this stricken fellow, Job threw up his arms and shot questions at God that demanded answers.

"Why, why, why?!?" was hurled at the one Job counted on for understanding.

And you know what the answer was? "Because I said so."

Ok, so it wasn't put so clumsily. But that was the spirit of the response. God laid out to Job that the reason all this happened was God's to understand. There was not going to be a point by point explanation that satisfied Job. Instead, God rightfully expressed that Job was not going to understand. God knew best and Job was going to have to accept that and be settled. Like a parent to their child, "because I said so" was going to have to suffice.

But unlike a parent to their child, or a peer to a peer, "because I said so" from God more than suffices. Why? Because unlike fallible humans, we can rely on that fact that God does not make mistakes. We can know in our hearts that He is infinitely smarter, clearer and more righteous than we could ever be, and in that we can rest. God has taken care of everything in the past, takes care of everything now, and will continue to take care of everything into the future. There is a totality to His rule and a universal reach to His love. We may not get the answer we like, and we may very well not like that we can't understand, but we do know that there is one who does.

From the lips of man "because I said so," can ring hollow. But from the voice of God there can be nothing more comforting.  

Gains and Losses

Every decision leads to unmistakable repercussions that can be measured in gains and losses. When a baby is born, he or she gains access to a world of possibilities but loses the warmth and protection found in the womb. When a child goes to school for the first time, they gain exposure to many friends they might never otherwise have met, but lose the security that came with being comfortable in known surroundings. When a person gets married, they gain the support and unity from another that was absent in solitude but lose the ability to live without burden.

But counting our gains against our losses does not always tell the whole story. This is especially true when ignoring God.  Adam in Eve found this truth no later than a blink in the timeline of creation. Their first major decision, absent from the direction and blessing of God, provided them with a myriad of gains and losses. We can see that decision in Genesis 3:6-7.

When the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was desirable to make one wise, she took from its fruit and ate; and she gave also to her husband with her, and he ate. Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loin coverings.

Adam and Eve chose to ignore God’s command and subsequently sin entered the world. What they discovered was that their eyes were opened and they understood perfectly what they were losing and what they would gain.

Adam and Eve lost much when they ate the fruit. They lost peace with each other and peace with God. They lost harmony, agreement, accord, order, unanimity, and tranquility. They lost joy in their untroubled lives. No longer were there jubilance, mirth, revelry, delight and cheer aplenty when walking in the garden.  They knew that they were naked and were not content. They were not happy, blissful, merry, cheerful or thrilled in their current state. The lost their carefree nature. They lost themselves.

But there can be no disagreement that they acquired much as well! When Adam and Eve followed their own path there was heaped upon them a multitude of gains. They were the recipients of shame in their nakedness. The proceeds of Adam and Eve’s decision were contempt, degradation, derision, dishonor, guilt, humiliation, infamy, irritation and remorse. Adam and Eve for the first time found sadness in waves unimaginable. They were bereaved, bitter, dejected, despairing, despondent, distressed, forlorn, grieved, heartbroken, languishing, pensive, troubled, and sorrowful. They would later hide from God because they had discovered fear. They were filled with anxiety, agitation, consternation, despair, dismay, distress, doubt, dread, panic, revulsion, terror, trembling trepidation and worry. To their already full bag they also had swirling confusion. Like most of us they for the first time felt bewilderment, chagrin, demoralization, distraction, embarrassment, fluster, tumult, turbulence and turmoil. Adam and Eve gained more than they ever imagined.

Gains and losses. It may seem like a simple case of addition and subtraction. But be careful, because as Adam and Eve found out, not every choice has an upside.