I love fantasy football. I have been playing regularly for several years now, and enjoy all aspects of it. Fantasy football drafts are occurring all over the place this time of year, and as a matter of fact I have two live drafts this weekend that I am attending.
Drafting, for those of you that may not know, is the wonderful opportunity one has to build a team from a pool of all available NFL players. From year to year you never know who you might have, and it is always exciting to see which NFL players you will be rooting for and against in the upcoming season. Strategizing with others as to who you might take and who you might avoid adds an extra dimension to the game.
But not all drafts are fun. Some drafts can be difficult, and even downright scary. Such was the case when I entered into a draft with Devil. The Devil had approached me about belonging to a very select league, one in which only he and I were the participants. And this was to be no ordinary draft. This was to be a fantasy biblical draft, with the winner taking….well, let’s just say that the stakes were very high.
As anyone who plays fantasy football knows, the draft can often make or break your season. It is up to you to not only have a solid lineup, but to be able to pick out the diamonds in the rough. One wants to find those players that nobody else expects much of but who are going to have solid seasons. When it came to our biblical draft, the importance of this was heightened.
When the Devil arrived, I was surprised to find that he was not as ugly as I expected. There were no boney fingers, no smoldering skin, no horns and no cloven hooves. As a matter of fact, he was one of the most handsome men I had ever see, dressed in a fine Armani suit, Gucci shoes and wearing what I believed to be a Cartier jewelry (this is not to say that Armani, Gucci and Cartier are evil. This is only to say that the Devil knows how to dress.)
But we weren’t drafting to win Cartier or Armani. We were drafting for much more than that. The rules of this draft were simple. Being the Devil, he insisted that we limit ourselves to six players on each team. The players could be any person, any animal, or just about anything from the Bible, save for one person he considered out of bounds. He didn’t mention the name of that man, but he didn’t need to. I agreed, feeling confident with my biblical knowledge that I could field a superior team to the Devil’s.
We sat down with our draft sheets and prepared ourselves. The Devil insisted that since he was a gentleman, I should go first. I nervously looked over the biblical rosters, both old and new testaments, trying to determine the most solid players. When it was time for my first pick, I choose David. David was a solid player, a righteous king who was led by God and took down the behemoth Goliath as a young man. To this day the name of King David is revered throughout the land.
I made a solid choice and I knew I put the Devil in a corner. He was going to have to find something just as good as his first pick, and that was going to be hard. But the Devil just smiled at me, and took Bathsheba as his first choice.
This was something I didn’t see coming. The Devil wasn’t going for power or might with his pick, but with the perfect answer to David, and the one thing that bedevils all men. Bathsheba was one of David’s great weaknesses, and not only would she be an effective tool against David, but the use of sexual lust was going to weaken any of the men I choose from then on out. This was not an obvious choice, but an effective one.
With my second pick I wanted to go with physical strength, and the best place to find that was in Samson. I knew that he the same weakness for the ladies as did David, but the power he received from the Lord was too much to pass up. I knew the Devil had already used a pick on Bathsheba, and I practically dared him to use another pick on the same type of player in Delilah.
The Devil wasn’t about to fall into my trap. Instead of going for the obvious choice in Delilah, the Devil filled a need in picking King Saul. This was a surprise, but I knew what he was going after. Saul fell away from the Lord, at one time trying to kill David and at another consulting the witch of Endor. Satan knew that Samson too was corruptible, and was hoping to add to fuel Samson’s corruption with an even greater corruption.
I was beginning to be concerned that the devil had an answer for all picks that I thought were locks, so I considered my third pick carefully. I wanted to go for someone that perhaps did not have the strength and political power of my first two picks, but who was supremely righteous. I settled on Elijah. Elijah was the man, bringing down fire, defeating the followers of Baal and being so special that he got to go to heaven in a whirlwind, as opposed to how the rest of us will do it through death. I knew Elijah was the one who would fill the righteousness gap I had and counter anyone the Devil could bring my way.
The Devil then took his turn, and went in a new direction. He decided to take Baal, a false god, and used Baal to represent all false gods. I thought this silly as Elijah had already proven Baal to be false, and that Baal was going to serve little purpose on the Devil’s team but to show their weakness. But the Devil decided to remind me right there that even though he and I knew that Baal was false, the pull of a false god to many was hard to overcome. This is especially true when that false god seems so much easier and pliable than the one true God. That was going to be a powerful weapon on the Devil’s team.
I scanned the biblical roster, knowing that I had only three spots left and a lot of qualified players to fill those spots. I had yet to fill my need for a utility player, one that could fill holes and be a support to the rest of the team. For that reason I choose Noah. He was a typical multidimensional player, being a craftsman, having a strong faith, bringing in the animal strength, being able to sail and having the wisdom to figure out difficult problems (like sending a bird out to determine when the water was receding). Noah was a good fit for my squad, and I was pleased with the choice.
The Devil then made a move that I should have predicted. He went to the New Testament and choose Thomas. At first I had no idea why he would take a disciple, but then it became clear. In choosing Thomas, he wasn’t taking the disciple part of Thomas. He was focusing (and in fact drafting) the doubt that lay inside Thomas before he saw the risen Lord. The devil drafted doubt, and with it gained a very powerful tool that has troubled man from the moment Eve doubted God and believed the serpent.
After that pick, I was admittedly shaken. I wasn’t sure where to go from there, and I fell into a common trap that afflicts many of today’s fantasy football leagues. It’s known as the run, and it occurs when a new, top position player is taken. Suddenly, everybody else in the draft decides that he or she needs to take a player from that position, and thus a run on that position occurs. This is where I was, recognizing that the Devil had taken a New Testament player, which we had both been ignoring up to that point. I decided I needed to go New Testament as well, and scrambled for the best. I settled upon Saul of Tarsus, otherwise known as Paul. He was a solid player, educated and steeped in the ways of Judaism. He was a man of conviction and service, and I knew he would fit well into the team I had been building. I also felt that he would play solid defense, as he had once been in the service of the enemy and knew the enemies playbook well.
The Devil seemed to expect me to go New Testament, and was not surprised by my pick. He immediately countered with Legion, the so named demon because there were many. Legion’s claim to fame was that he had once faced off with the Lord. I knew that was a bold but somewhat strange move, as the last I had heard Legion was thrown into a pig and sent hurtling towards the sea. Nevertheless, I did not underestimate this pick.
I continued my New Testament run with my fifth pick. I took a dark horse in James, brother of the Lord, believing that he could be a breakout pick for me. Truly James does not have the pop of a Peter or a Lazarus. But I had faith that James could hold his own, and make solid plays that would keep me in the game. The Devil threw back at me his pick of Judas. He smiled his gleaming white smile and suggested that Judas was not only picked because he knew my team’s playbook, but also that he was a betrayer. From then on I would always have to keep in mind that at any point a member of my team could become traitorous and rob me of the trust and hope I had. As he said this, I began to feel uneasy, believing that the fact was I could not trust the team I had created. Doubt and fear had already started to creep into my mind earlier, and now a sense of paranoia and mistrust became their companions. My sixth pick was coming, and I had to make the most of it.
By the time I got my head together from the jolt of the Judas pick, I was already shaking and very uneasy. I had to make the right choice, or everything I was hoping for could fall apart. I had to go big, but at the same time I had to pick someone with little chance of faltering. I decided to choose John. John brought to me a strong skill set, and he would team well with Elijah in prophecy. This was the man that had the vision of Revelation and the only one to whom God entrusted that vision. There was no doubt that he would help me.
I was done picking, and felt uneasy about my team. I know that I had chosen some very powerful biblical players, and that on paper I had a solid team. But I was shaken by whom the Devil had chosen, and the doubt and fear that had crept into me earlier was growing stronger. The stakes were too high for me to have made the wrong decision with one of my picks, and the Devil still had a pick left.
That’s when the Devil made his final pick. I sat with a dreadful anticipation, and the Devil did not disappoint. With a smirk that darkened the entire room, the devil countered my pick of John with the tribulations of Revelation. He poured into his pick all the famine, pestilence, war, disease, fear, sorrow, envy, disgust, loathing, hatred, and loss of all hope that will encompass those times. He directed his last pick at me, and insisted I look upon it and recognize that from this pick there was no escape for me and my team. The devil grinned like a champion, before a play had ever been made.
That is when I felt it. There was nothing I could do to beat his team. We hadn’t even begun the games and he was already victorious. I was without hope, without joy, and without a chance. The future I had desired for my team and the chance of reigning victorious seemed impossible, even though nothing had happened. I hung my head, certain that there was nothing I could do.
And there was nothing I could do. Not on my own anyway. I looked at the Devil, defeated, and begged him to consider adding a seventh pick. I asked him if he would consider a flex spot, perhaps one more player for each of our teams. He didn’t have to agree, but it would be greatly appreciated if he did.
He laughed at my ignorance of his dominance and assured me that one more player for each of our teams would be fine, but insisted that he choose first. I agreed, and without hesitation, the Devil choose death. Plain and simple, the Devil chooses the finality and power of death to play for him. He called it the nail in the coffin for my team, and in all cases he was right.
But I don’t ask for something like the flex spot without having a purpose. Though the devil had put the final nail in my coffin, what he didn’t expect was that I had a crowbar to escape that coffin. I slowly lifted my head, and stared the devil straight in the eyes. I told him that most would consider my circumstances dim, and that he should be congratulated on a nearly perfect draft. But with my seventh pick, I wanted a simple player, one that is unassuming but very powerful. I wanted the grace that comes from Jesus, and allows every man to come to Him for salvation. I wanted the same grace that allows the most hideous among us, in any abhorrent circumstances, to be brought up and out of them, and delivered to Him. I wanted the grace that is only given by Him, and is available for all.
The Devil jumped up and shouted that I was a cheater. He said we agreed that He should not be allowed to be drafted, and that I was out of bounds. But I assured the Devil I wasn’t cheating, and that the grace that Jesus offers is fair game. Grace cannot be denied under any circumstances, because it is available freely to all. The Devil just looked at me, and started twisting one of his rings around his finger. He sat back down, looked over his roster and flipped it over to the blank side. He took out his fountain pen and scribbled something quickly on the back. He then stood up, extending his hand for me to shake. I responded in kind, and he simply said to me “Good draft, but I am going to have to concede the season”. He tossed his roster on the table, turned and left.
I sat down, my heart racing. I was excited and very nervous at that moment, to be sure. I buried my head in my hands for a few moments. When I took it out, I looked around to make sure that he had really gone. Satisfied that the Devil was, I reached over for his roster. Lifting it, I read the words the Devil had scribbled in black ink.
You are not worthy of Grace.
The Devil lost that day, but in defeat he was still nipping at my heals. He wanted to keep me reeling with doubt. But this day I was not in doubt. This day, the devil had been bested. Through grace my draft was saved. Through grace, I was saved.
Friday, August 27, 2010
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Babbling Endlesly
I have always loved listening to people that speak languages other than my native English. It’s not that I can understand them, or can even pretend to pick out a few words. It’s that I love to listen to them and try to figure out what they are talking about by watching their body language, expressions and inflections. I have spent much time teaching English to those with little or no fluency, and I find that trying to work through even the simplest words can be challenging, enjoyable and very funny.
But this wasn’t always the case. There was a time when there was but one language, and all spoke and understood this common tongue. Genesis 11 tells us about the time when the whole earth spoke in one common tongue, and apparently a majority of these people liked to hang out together. I guess this makes sense, as we as humans rarely make it a point to hang out with people who don’t speak our language. It makes telling jokes very difficult.
These people apparently found a nice piece of real estate in Shinar, and it wasn’t being used for anything else so they decided to settle there. I have to give them a lot of credit, because apparently the first thing they decided to do was build some shelter. Have you ever watched Survivor? Half of the time these people can’t decide whether they should build some rickety lean to, start a fire or look for some food. And that’s among 8 people.
What they cannot be given credit for is their motives. This is an often misunderstood passage, as many believe that they were trying to build a tower to reach God. On the contrary, they were trying to create a city with a large tower. This tower was going to be built as a monument to their awesomeness as opposed to reaching God. Isn’t this something people have continued to do throughout time? The Egyptians built towers to their awesomeness in the form of the pyramids. The Tower of Pisa in Italy was built, and now shows the awesomeness of being slightly askew. Big Ben in London is a tower dedicated to the awesomeness of the clock.
So God decides to let the people finish their little tower, and comes on by to take a look at their handiwork. God wasn’t just passing by on the way to the gym. He made it a point to come and see what had been done. It is not as though He was going to come down and say “Nice work on that tower, people! Can I purchase naming rights?” Instead, He was no doubt furious at them for what they had done.
Why would God have been furious at this architectural mastery? Consider the following. Not too long before, God had to destroy the earth and everything in it because of mankind’s wickedness. He saved Noah and his family, and gave the command that they repopulate the whole earth. It wasn’t that many generations after the flood that these people decided to ignore God, hold up in one place and make this city and tower. To top it off, it is very likely that Noah was still alive, and probably wasn’t thrilled with the idea of the tower. He probably told them something to the effect of “um, guys, remember God and that whole flood thing? That kinda means He’s serious when He says something. And if you think that you’ll be safe from another flood in that tower, trust me, you won’t. That last flood covered the Himalayas! You know, where the Yeti lives….er, lived.”
Yet all of Noah and the godly peoples protest (and at this point the number of godly people had dwindled) fell on deaf ears. This is why God knew He needed to do something. Genesis 11:6 shows God saying that nothing would be restrained from these people now. It was not that God was afraid that He couldn’t stop them, but that the remnant of godly people on earth had no more control of influence over those that decided to go against God’s commands. It never ceases to amaze just how quickly mankind forgets God and his instructions.
I like what happens next. God doesn’t do anything as outwardly dramatic as the flood or an earthquake or major world calamity. He simply (at least simply for Him) tweaks the languages they speak, so that they could not understand one another. You have to imagine that at that moment, all projects among these people stopped. Everyone probably thought everyone else was crazy, save for the few that could understand each other.
Have you ever tried to communicate with someone who doesn’t speak your language? I believe that it is an inherent quality in mankind that when trying to make a simple statement in your language to someone in who speaks in another language and failing, an automatic secondary attempt is made. With that secondary attempt though, nothing will change EXCEPT THE VOLUME OF YOUR VOICE! This is especially true among children, who when failing to get their message across the first time will simply RAISE THEIR VOICE! I have seen on many occasions adults doing the same thing, as if somehow yelling the previously misunderstood spoken statement will make the native Korean speaker magically understand your English sentence.
Imagine this scene at the tower. Everybody is trying to communicate with everyone else, not being understood, then turning the decibels up and yelling at each other. Now not only do you have the inability to understand, but now hurt feelings, because the wacko talking to you in gibberish is yelling at you! Well, that won’t stand, so you yell back, thinking that he or she might be able to understand you at a louder level. Now everybody is yelling, feelings are getting hurt, babies are crying and the dogs are running and hiding under tables and chairs.
I always figured there are pretty much only three words you need to know in any language to get along. The three words needed to get along in any language are food, bathroom and sleep. If you know the word “food”, you should be able to get something to eat (and most likely drink). If you know the word “bathroom” you should be able to find a place to use the restroom and maybe even get a shower. And if you know the word "sleep", you should be able to find a place to lay your head. But in the case of the tower project they couldn’t even communicate those basic needs.
God graciously allows them to disperse into their own tribes and go out into the world to settle it. Interestingly enough, the city project was named Babel which means confusion. It is no coincidence that Babel is used 262 times in the Old Testament, mostly in the form Babylon. Since then Babylon has been pretty much the center of false religion throughout the Bible, all the way to Revelation. But God will eventually put an end to all of the confusion, and all will be right.
Until then, keep in mind what was started in the land of Shinar. Keep in mind what happens when we try to build a monument to our awesomeness and ignore what God has commanded. Keep in mind the ease with which God can thwart even our best laid plans. Keep this in mind the next time you are talking to the stranger who does not understand you, but wants so badly to communicate with you. Keep all this in mind as you raise your voice, knowing that you are oh so close to that magical noise level that will produce understanding.
But this wasn’t always the case. There was a time when there was but one language, and all spoke and understood this common tongue. Genesis 11 tells us about the time when the whole earth spoke in one common tongue, and apparently a majority of these people liked to hang out together. I guess this makes sense, as we as humans rarely make it a point to hang out with people who don’t speak our language. It makes telling jokes very difficult.
These people apparently found a nice piece of real estate in Shinar, and it wasn’t being used for anything else so they decided to settle there. I have to give them a lot of credit, because apparently the first thing they decided to do was build some shelter. Have you ever watched Survivor? Half of the time these people can’t decide whether they should build some rickety lean to, start a fire or look for some food. And that’s among 8 people.
What they cannot be given credit for is their motives. This is an often misunderstood passage, as many believe that they were trying to build a tower to reach God. On the contrary, they were trying to create a city with a large tower. This tower was going to be built as a monument to their awesomeness as opposed to reaching God. Isn’t this something people have continued to do throughout time? The Egyptians built towers to their awesomeness in the form of the pyramids. The Tower of Pisa in Italy was built, and now shows the awesomeness of being slightly askew. Big Ben in London is a tower dedicated to the awesomeness of the clock.
So God decides to let the people finish their little tower, and comes on by to take a look at their handiwork. God wasn’t just passing by on the way to the gym. He made it a point to come and see what had been done. It is not as though He was going to come down and say “Nice work on that tower, people! Can I purchase naming rights?” Instead, He was no doubt furious at them for what they had done.
Why would God have been furious at this architectural mastery? Consider the following. Not too long before, God had to destroy the earth and everything in it because of mankind’s wickedness. He saved Noah and his family, and gave the command that they repopulate the whole earth. It wasn’t that many generations after the flood that these people decided to ignore God, hold up in one place and make this city and tower. To top it off, it is very likely that Noah was still alive, and probably wasn’t thrilled with the idea of the tower. He probably told them something to the effect of “um, guys, remember God and that whole flood thing? That kinda means He’s serious when He says something. And if you think that you’ll be safe from another flood in that tower, trust me, you won’t. That last flood covered the Himalayas! You know, where the Yeti lives….er, lived.”
Yet all of Noah and the godly peoples protest (and at this point the number of godly people had dwindled) fell on deaf ears. This is why God knew He needed to do something. Genesis 11:6 shows God saying that nothing would be restrained from these people now. It was not that God was afraid that He couldn’t stop them, but that the remnant of godly people on earth had no more control of influence over those that decided to go against God’s commands. It never ceases to amaze just how quickly mankind forgets God and his instructions.
I like what happens next. God doesn’t do anything as outwardly dramatic as the flood or an earthquake or major world calamity. He simply (at least simply for Him) tweaks the languages they speak, so that they could not understand one another. You have to imagine that at that moment, all projects among these people stopped. Everyone probably thought everyone else was crazy, save for the few that could understand each other.
Have you ever tried to communicate with someone who doesn’t speak your language? I believe that it is an inherent quality in mankind that when trying to make a simple statement in your language to someone in who speaks in another language and failing, an automatic secondary attempt is made. With that secondary attempt though, nothing will change EXCEPT THE VOLUME OF YOUR VOICE! This is especially true among children, who when failing to get their message across the first time will simply RAISE THEIR VOICE! I have seen on many occasions adults doing the same thing, as if somehow yelling the previously misunderstood spoken statement will make the native Korean speaker magically understand your English sentence.
Imagine this scene at the tower. Everybody is trying to communicate with everyone else, not being understood, then turning the decibels up and yelling at each other. Now not only do you have the inability to understand, but now hurt feelings, because the wacko talking to you in gibberish is yelling at you! Well, that won’t stand, so you yell back, thinking that he or she might be able to understand you at a louder level. Now everybody is yelling, feelings are getting hurt, babies are crying and the dogs are running and hiding under tables and chairs.
I always figured there are pretty much only three words you need to know in any language to get along. The three words needed to get along in any language are food, bathroom and sleep. If you know the word “food”, you should be able to get something to eat (and most likely drink). If you know the word “bathroom” you should be able to find a place to use the restroom and maybe even get a shower. And if you know the word "sleep", you should be able to find a place to lay your head. But in the case of the tower project they couldn’t even communicate those basic needs.
God graciously allows them to disperse into their own tribes and go out into the world to settle it. Interestingly enough, the city project was named Babel which means confusion. It is no coincidence that Babel is used 262 times in the Old Testament, mostly in the form Babylon. Since then Babylon has been pretty much the center of false religion throughout the Bible, all the way to Revelation. But God will eventually put an end to all of the confusion, and all will be right.
Until then, keep in mind what was started in the land of Shinar. Keep in mind what happens when we try to build a monument to our awesomeness and ignore what God has commanded. Keep in mind the ease with which God can thwart even our best laid plans. Keep this in mind the next time you are talking to the stranger who does not understand you, but wants so badly to communicate with you. Keep all this in mind as you raise your voice, knowing that you are oh so close to that magical noise level that will produce understanding.
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Hey God - Let's Make A Deal!
I doubt there are many people in this world that have not at one time or another tried to bargain with God. I include atheists and agnostics among these, because whether they admit it or not I am sure they have tried to make a bargain with something they consider greater than themselves.
People bargain over any number of things. A schoolboy could try and bargain with God that should he only pass his spelling test, he will be good and clean his room. A teenager might bargain with God that if only she can go out with that one particular boy she will be sure to help her mother with dinner for a week. The young man might bargain with God that if he is hired for a particular job he will stop spending so much time at the club and focus on more important things. The old lady may bargain with God that if only her husband survives the bypass operation, that she will see to it that all of her grandchildren make it to church every Sunday.
Bargaining with God is nothing new, and will continue for the rest of human history. Genesis 18 shows us one of the earliest examples of bargaining with God, and just how humorous these deals can look.
Genesis 18 shows Abraham content by his tent in Mamre, happy in his place. The Lord and two other angelic beings in human form choose this time to appear to him. Abraham was more than thrilled to humble himself before them, and then provide them with what they needed. He ran to tell his wife Sarah to make some bread and had others prepare a fine feast. I know how this feels. I had once attempted to run and tell my wife to hurriedly bake a cake for friends that were coming over to watch football, citing Genesis 18:6 as proof text that it was her duty. However, she promptly reminded me that I was not Abraham and I was not bringing the Lord to dinner, so it was going to have to wait. Her insight and wisdom can sometimes be too much.
Over the course of Genesis 18, God lets Abraham know that He had to wipe out Sodom and Gomorrah because of their detestability. God is righteous and just, and it would seem difficult to argue with Him on this matter. Yet Abraham knew his son Lot was there, and began bargaining with God not to destroy the cities.
Now Abraham knew God. He had to have known that God was just, and that when He made his mind up on a matter, that was going to be that. Abraham had to know that whatever kind of deal he could conjure up the Lord was going to be at least one step ahead. Yet Abraham insists on pleading, and though the text shows us the conversation between Abraham and God, I believe there could have been more to it than that. I imagine the conversation could have gone something like this:
Abraham: “Are you really going to destroy the righteous with the unrighteous in Sodom and Gomorrah? Far be it from you, the greatest God, to kill righteous with unrighteous. You would never do such an unjust thing! I beg you, if there are 50 righteous people down there, would you spare the cities?
God: “If I find 50 righteous people, Abraham, I will spare the city”
Abraham: (thinking) Awesome! God is going to spare the city and all that need to be there are 50 righteous people! They are good size cities, 50 righteous people shouldn’t be too hard to find. But wait a second. God was a little too quick to accept that deal. Maybe He knows something I don’t. I better make sure this is the best deal I can get.
Abraham: “Look, God, I know that I am not but dust and ashes, and I am humbled to speak to you and be in your presence. But I was thinking about something. Let’s say you get to 45 righteous people, just a little short of 50. Maybe a couple of families left for vacation, and you would otherwise have had well over 50, but now you are just short. Are you really going to destroy the cities because you came just a bit short? How about sparing the cities on account of 45 righteous?”
God: “I will spare the cities if I find 45 righteous people.”
Abraham: Alright! 45 should be doable. 50 seemed like it might be a bit much, but 45 can be found. Then again, God didn’t really argue the point with me. And he did know that secret thing about Sarah laughing to herself earlier, which makes me think I didn’t make the best deal. God is reasonable. I’m sure I can talk him down a little.
Abraham: “God, not to keep changing on you, but I’m thinking that 40 righteous would still be a good amount. 40 is a nice even number, not that I would want to be wandering the desert for that long or anything. Would you consider sparing the cities for 40 righteous people?”
God: “I will spare the cities if I find 40 righteous people.”
Abraham: Cool, cool. Finding 40 takes a little of the pressure off. Surely 40 will be easy. Then again, there was something in His voice that sounded like He didn’t expect that many to be found. There was something a little off about it.
Abraham: “Lord, please, please don’t be angry. Could we possibly knock it down to 30? I mean, 30 are still good, right?”
God: “I will spare the cities if I find 30 righteous people.”
Abraham: Good. 30 are good. I am positive God will find 30 righteous people there. Yet they do have some pretty weird laws in those cities. You do have to be rich to be there, and they don’t exactly like foreigners. The can kind of do whatever they want to a poor person, even killing them if it is in their whim to do so. Righteousness doesn’t flow out of these people at all.
Abraham: “Lord, sorry to interrupt, but did I say 30 before? I meant to go with 20. Is there any way you could see in your infinite wisdom and justice to spare the city on account of 20?
God: “I will spare the cities if I find 20 righteous people.”
Abraham: 20. That’s the number. Their laws might be reprehensible, but I am sure out of all those people, 20 righteous can be found. Of course, I did forget about one thing. They like to punt puppies. They just go ahead and punt puppies all over the place. I heard they even had a puppy punting festival. Now that’s just wrong on every level, I don’t care who you are.
Abraham: “Lord, your anger might be great at me, but I have a last request. Please, please, please, may you spare the cities on account of 10 righteous?”
God: “I will spare the cities if I find 10 righteous people.”
Abraham: I’m pretty confident on the 10. I mean, there is my son Lot, he is righteous, and I’m sure he knows 9 others like him. At least, he should…
Of course, the Lord wouldn’t even find 10 righteous in the entire cities of Sodom and Gomorrah. Abraham pleaded and begged God, and God was willing to listen to those pleas even though He knew what was right and just and what the cities deserved. He still allowed Abraham his voice, and God would not forget Abraham when it came time to destroy the cities. The Lord saved Lot, a righteous man, from the terror that befell those cities.
Bargaining with the Lord will not always produce the results that we want. Yet God is a righteous and just God, and what we want is not always best for us. Romans 8:28 tells us that “God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.” (NASB). The truth and majesty of this one scripture cannot be downplayed or dismissed. We often can run into trouble and difficult realities, much like Abraham saw in God’s desire to bring justice to Sodom and Gomorrah. But as in saving the righteous Lot, God will make things work together for good. It’s just that sometimes, like Abraham, we are all too human to see that truth in the midst of the trial.
People bargain over any number of things. A schoolboy could try and bargain with God that should he only pass his spelling test, he will be good and clean his room. A teenager might bargain with God that if only she can go out with that one particular boy she will be sure to help her mother with dinner for a week. The young man might bargain with God that if he is hired for a particular job he will stop spending so much time at the club and focus on more important things. The old lady may bargain with God that if only her husband survives the bypass operation, that she will see to it that all of her grandchildren make it to church every Sunday.
Bargaining with God is nothing new, and will continue for the rest of human history. Genesis 18 shows us one of the earliest examples of bargaining with God, and just how humorous these deals can look.
Genesis 18 shows Abraham content by his tent in Mamre, happy in his place. The Lord and two other angelic beings in human form choose this time to appear to him. Abraham was more than thrilled to humble himself before them, and then provide them with what they needed. He ran to tell his wife Sarah to make some bread and had others prepare a fine feast. I know how this feels. I had once attempted to run and tell my wife to hurriedly bake a cake for friends that were coming over to watch football, citing Genesis 18:6 as proof text that it was her duty. However, she promptly reminded me that I was not Abraham and I was not bringing the Lord to dinner, so it was going to have to wait. Her insight and wisdom can sometimes be too much.
Over the course of Genesis 18, God lets Abraham know that He had to wipe out Sodom and Gomorrah because of their detestability. God is righteous and just, and it would seem difficult to argue with Him on this matter. Yet Abraham knew his son Lot was there, and began bargaining with God not to destroy the cities.
Now Abraham knew God. He had to have known that God was just, and that when He made his mind up on a matter, that was going to be that. Abraham had to know that whatever kind of deal he could conjure up the Lord was going to be at least one step ahead. Yet Abraham insists on pleading, and though the text shows us the conversation between Abraham and God, I believe there could have been more to it than that. I imagine the conversation could have gone something like this:
Abraham: “Are you really going to destroy the righteous with the unrighteous in Sodom and Gomorrah? Far be it from you, the greatest God, to kill righteous with unrighteous. You would never do such an unjust thing! I beg you, if there are 50 righteous people down there, would you spare the cities?
God: “If I find 50 righteous people, Abraham, I will spare the city”
Abraham: (thinking) Awesome! God is going to spare the city and all that need to be there are 50 righteous people! They are good size cities, 50 righteous people shouldn’t be too hard to find. But wait a second. God was a little too quick to accept that deal. Maybe He knows something I don’t. I better make sure this is the best deal I can get.
Abraham: “Look, God, I know that I am not but dust and ashes, and I am humbled to speak to you and be in your presence. But I was thinking about something. Let’s say you get to 45 righteous people, just a little short of 50. Maybe a couple of families left for vacation, and you would otherwise have had well over 50, but now you are just short. Are you really going to destroy the cities because you came just a bit short? How about sparing the cities on account of 45 righteous?”
God: “I will spare the cities if I find 45 righteous people.”
Abraham: Alright! 45 should be doable. 50 seemed like it might be a bit much, but 45 can be found. Then again, God didn’t really argue the point with me. And he did know that secret thing about Sarah laughing to herself earlier, which makes me think I didn’t make the best deal. God is reasonable. I’m sure I can talk him down a little.
Abraham: “God, not to keep changing on you, but I’m thinking that 40 righteous would still be a good amount. 40 is a nice even number, not that I would want to be wandering the desert for that long or anything. Would you consider sparing the cities for 40 righteous people?”
God: “I will spare the cities if I find 40 righteous people.”
Abraham: Cool, cool. Finding 40 takes a little of the pressure off. Surely 40 will be easy. Then again, there was something in His voice that sounded like He didn’t expect that many to be found. There was something a little off about it.
Abraham: “Lord, please, please don’t be angry. Could we possibly knock it down to 30? I mean, 30 are still good, right?”
God: “I will spare the cities if I find 30 righteous people.”
Abraham: Good. 30 are good. I am positive God will find 30 righteous people there. Yet they do have some pretty weird laws in those cities. You do have to be rich to be there, and they don’t exactly like foreigners. The can kind of do whatever they want to a poor person, even killing them if it is in their whim to do so. Righteousness doesn’t flow out of these people at all.
Abraham: “Lord, sorry to interrupt, but did I say 30 before? I meant to go with 20. Is there any way you could see in your infinite wisdom and justice to spare the city on account of 20?
God: “I will spare the cities if I find 20 righteous people.”
Abraham: 20. That’s the number. Their laws might be reprehensible, but I am sure out of all those people, 20 righteous can be found. Of course, I did forget about one thing. They like to punt puppies. They just go ahead and punt puppies all over the place. I heard they even had a puppy punting festival. Now that’s just wrong on every level, I don’t care who you are.
Abraham: “Lord, your anger might be great at me, but I have a last request. Please, please, please, may you spare the cities on account of 10 righteous?”
God: “I will spare the cities if I find 10 righteous people.”
Abraham: I’m pretty confident on the 10. I mean, there is my son Lot, he is righteous, and I’m sure he knows 9 others like him. At least, he should…
Of course, the Lord wouldn’t even find 10 righteous in the entire cities of Sodom and Gomorrah. Abraham pleaded and begged God, and God was willing to listen to those pleas even though He knew what was right and just and what the cities deserved. He still allowed Abraham his voice, and God would not forget Abraham when it came time to destroy the cities. The Lord saved Lot, a righteous man, from the terror that befell those cities.
Bargaining with the Lord will not always produce the results that we want. Yet God is a righteous and just God, and what we want is not always best for us. Romans 8:28 tells us that “God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.” (NASB). The truth and majesty of this one scripture cannot be downplayed or dismissed. We often can run into trouble and difficult realities, much like Abraham saw in God’s desire to bring justice to Sodom and Gomorrah. But as in saving the righteous Lot, God will make things work together for good. It’s just that sometimes, like Abraham, we are all too human to see that truth in the midst of the trial.
Sunday, August 15, 2010
Churches, churches everywhere
I am a huge fan of church names. And when I say fan, I mean that sometimes there is no better form of entertainment that running through a list of some of the more off-the-wall titles.
I am not simply referring to the denominational identification a church takes and puts on the front door. I am also referring to the full, sometimes overly descriptive name that a church has. This name can contain factors ranging from the name of the place in which the church resides to the point of the Gospel that the church is trying to get across.
There are many church names that have done more than just tickle my funny bone over the years. Some have outright ripped down any wall of politeness I thought I had and made me guffaw at their mention. Some I have visited, while others I have only heard about. Yet all have that necessary little something that makes them worthy of a special file in the recesses of my mind.
In Washington sits a church called Puyallup United Methodist Church. This is certainly a place where those of us that are down need to visit. In Missouri stands Half Way Baptist Church. Half way between what points I am not entirely sure, but at least you know you are making progress when you are Half Way. Staying in Missouri, around Gore Springs, is Black Jack Missionary Baptist Church. I hear it may be customary to put $21 in the offering plate every Sunday (or at least an Ace and a face card).
In Louisville, Kentucky is the Original Church of God, with Pastor A. Jones. I thought the original church of God was somewhere in the Middle East, but maybe I was wrong. You might also think that the Original Church of God would be led by someone with a more original name, like Bugaboo Garfinklestein. Heading up to Maryland you will find the Boring United Methodist Church. They probably figured that in setting the bar so low, a congregant would never be disappointed. There is also the First Haitian Free Methodist Church. Depending on how you read it you might think Haitians don’t attend. Or if they do, they are Free Haitians, which is very nice. Also, does the church have some sort of certificate showing that they are the first?
If you can make it out to North Dakota you will find the Devils Lake United Methodist Church. They must really believe in the old adage of keeping your friends close and your enemies closer. Pennsylvania is home to the Weedville Church, which I understand is very popular among the younger crowd. Torch United Methodist Church is in Ohio and is never, ever to be read as a directive. Rappers delight in Yoe Christ Church in Pennsylvania, while unrepentant jailbirds may find solace in Crooksville First United Methodist Church of western Ohio. And for those that just can’t decide there is the Flippin Church of God in Arkansas.
If you head out West (and even in some places in the East), you are likely to run into the Cowboy Church. Hat, boots and horses are not required, but encouraged. In Clearwater, Florida is a church that calls itself the Church-By-The-Sea. This is a beautiful name, but technically inaccurate, as if one is in Clearwater they are on the Gulf of Mexico. I guess Church-By-The-Gulf-Of-Mexico doesn’t have the same ring to it.
For those that prefer their church to represent itself specifically, The Church of I Am that I Am stands ready. House of God, Incorporated would be perfect for those with their MBA, and the “Exciting” Singing Hills Baptist Church is ready for those that want to stay upbeat. Granted if the hills are truly singing, it’s bound to be exciting. Finally, my personal favorite is the So Help Me God Church of Christ which provides C.R.A.C.K. House Ministries. C.R.A.C.K. stands for Christ Resurrects After Crack Kills. It doesn’t get much better than that.
While all of these churches listed are real, there are some that I would love to see come into existence. The Church-By-The-Sea should branch out and plant another church, this one called the Church-In-The-Sea, with Pastor Davey Jones. It would be wonderful for passing cruise ships or the occasional man overboard that finds himself just floating there on Sunday morning. For the more analytically minded there would be the Church of Perpetual Motion (Reformed). There would need to be no friction for this church to survive. The Church of the F-450 could easily grow out of the Cowboy Church. Just with a much bigger parking lot.
When it comes to joining a church, denominational differences tend to get in the way for many people. These people need to have a specific denomination attached to a church before they will even consider joining. And when choosing one, there is a list as long as your arm to decide from. There’s Catholic, Baptist, Methodist, Lutheran, Presbyterian, Anglican, Anabaptist, Pentecostal, Apostolic, AME, Eastern Orthodox and many others. Under each of these denominations are a slew of more specified branches, ranging from the Armenian Catholic Church to the Confessional Evangelical Lutheran Conference to the Wesleyan Reform Union Methodist. Just reading the list qualifies as a full aerobic workout.
The New Testament churches didn’t suffer from the same naming needs which identify 21rst century churches. Those first century churches were very much to the point and probably better off for it. In Acts, we see the church formation. The New Testament Greek word from which the English word “church” is derived is “ekklesia”, which most literally means an assembly of persons who meet together for a common purpose. This group had a most uncommon purpose which was spreading the truth of Jesus Christ.
Like many churches today, this first “ekklesia” was mocked almost immediately. On the Day of Pentecost, when many of the members began to speak other languages thanks to the Holy Spirit, some hearing them mocked them and claimed they were drunk (Acts 2:13). Now I have been in contact with many inebriated people, and have never known someone fluent only in English to suddenly start blurting out German as if they were the Chancellor. I have had some foreign friends whose English mysteriously improves when they have a few drinks, and some friends who for some reason like to talk with a British accent afterwards. But never have I seen outright new language capabilities. As an aside, I also find Peter’s defense against these accusations markedly culturally appropriate - for the time. He basically states in Acts 2:15 that they couldn’t be drunk because it is too early in the day. If one used that defense today, I am certain a smart aleck in the crowd would shout out “Well, it’s 5 o’clock somewhere!”
The New Testament churches had simple names. These names were to the point and unmistakable. First was the Church in Acts, which was basically the Church. Later there was the Church in Ephesus, the Church in Smyrna, the Church in Sardis, the Church in Philadelphia and so on. It was where they were, and that was it. I think of all the church names, I would like mine to be simply called Church. Church may not be as fancy or attention getting as some other names, but it is simple and to the point. Some might question Church and ask it to be defined more specifically so that it could be categorized appropriately. “What exactly do you believe at Church?” they might say. “What are your customs? Your traditions? What do you dress like when you go there? Who gives the message? What does the person giving the message wear? Do you kneel? Do you sing? Do you sing contemporary or just classic hymns? How long are your services? Do you collect offerings? Do you have communion? Is it on the first Sunday or the fourth Sunday after the full moon and before a rooster has laid an egg on a pointed roof?”
All are good questions, I suppose. But at Church, we are simple and to the point. We know that The Bible shows Gods eternal plan, from the beginning of creation to the end of recorded time. It shows that Jesus was fully man and fully God, and that He is eternal. We know that Jesus is the only way for man to be saved in God’s eternal plan, and that in The End Christ is victorious. The Holy Spirit indwells the believer, and we can go directly to Christ with our prayers, petitions and praises. As for the other questions people will throw at Church, well, I just can’t answer those immediately. I’ll just have to wait until I have a catchy name.
I am not simply referring to the denominational identification a church takes and puts on the front door. I am also referring to the full, sometimes overly descriptive name that a church has. This name can contain factors ranging from the name of the place in which the church resides to the point of the Gospel that the church is trying to get across.
There are many church names that have done more than just tickle my funny bone over the years. Some have outright ripped down any wall of politeness I thought I had and made me guffaw at their mention. Some I have visited, while others I have only heard about. Yet all have that necessary little something that makes them worthy of a special file in the recesses of my mind.
In Washington sits a church called Puyallup United Methodist Church. This is certainly a place where those of us that are down need to visit. In Missouri stands Half Way Baptist Church. Half way between what points I am not entirely sure, but at least you know you are making progress when you are Half Way. Staying in Missouri, around Gore Springs, is Black Jack Missionary Baptist Church. I hear it may be customary to put $21 in the offering plate every Sunday (or at least an Ace and a face card).
In Louisville, Kentucky is the Original Church of God, with Pastor A. Jones. I thought the original church of God was somewhere in the Middle East, but maybe I was wrong. You might also think that the Original Church of God would be led by someone with a more original name, like Bugaboo Garfinklestein. Heading up to Maryland you will find the Boring United Methodist Church. They probably figured that in setting the bar so low, a congregant would never be disappointed. There is also the First Haitian Free Methodist Church. Depending on how you read it you might think Haitians don’t attend. Or if they do, they are Free Haitians, which is very nice. Also, does the church have some sort of certificate showing that they are the first?
If you can make it out to North Dakota you will find the Devils Lake United Methodist Church. They must really believe in the old adage of keeping your friends close and your enemies closer. Pennsylvania is home to the Weedville Church, which I understand is very popular among the younger crowd. Torch United Methodist Church is in Ohio and is never, ever to be read as a directive. Rappers delight in Yoe Christ Church in Pennsylvania, while unrepentant jailbirds may find solace in Crooksville First United Methodist Church of western Ohio. And for those that just can’t decide there is the Flippin Church of God in Arkansas.
If you head out West (and even in some places in the East), you are likely to run into the Cowboy Church. Hat, boots and horses are not required, but encouraged. In Clearwater, Florida is a church that calls itself the Church-By-The-Sea. This is a beautiful name, but technically inaccurate, as if one is in Clearwater they are on the Gulf of Mexico. I guess Church-By-The-Gulf-Of-Mexico doesn’t have the same ring to it.
For those that prefer their church to represent itself specifically, The Church of I Am that I Am stands ready. House of God, Incorporated would be perfect for those with their MBA, and the “Exciting” Singing Hills Baptist Church is ready for those that want to stay upbeat. Granted if the hills are truly singing, it’s bound to be exciting. Finally, my personal favorite is the So Help Me God Church of Christ which provides C.R.A.C.K. House Ministries. C.R.A.C.K. stands for Christ Resurrects After Crack Kills. It doesn’t get much better than that.
While all of these churches listed are real, there are some that I would love to see come into existence. The Church-By-The-Sea should branch out and plant another church, this one called the Church-In-The-Sea, with Pastor Davey Jones. It would be wonderful for passing cruise ships or the occasional man overboard that finds himself just floating there on Sunday morning. For the more analytically minded there would be the Church of Perpetual Motion (Reformed). There would need to be no friction for this church to survive. The Church of the F-450 could easily grow out of the Cowboy Church. Just with a much bigger parking lot.
When it comes to joining a church, denominational differences tend to get in the way for many people. These people need to have a specific denomination attached to a church before they will even consider joining. And when choosing one, there is a list as long as your arm to decide from. There’s Catholic, Baptist, Methodist, Lutheran, Presbyterian, Anglican, Anabaptist, Pentecostal, Apostolic, AME, Eastern Orthodox and many others. Under each of these denominations are a slew of more specified branches, ranging from the Armenian Catholic Church to the Confessional Evangelical Lutheran Conference to the Wesleyan Reform Union Methodist. Just reading the list qualifies as a full aerobic workout.
The New Testament churches didn’t suffer from the same naming needs which identify 21rst century churches. Those first century churches were very much to the point and probably better off for it. In Acts, we see the church formation. The New Testament Greek word from which the English word “church” is derived is “ekklesia”, which most literally means an assembly of persons who meet together for a common purpose. This group had a most uncommon purpose which was spreading the truth of Jesus Christ.
Like many churches today, this first “ekklesia” was mocked almost immediately. On the Day of Pentecost, when many of the members began to speak other languages thanks to the Holy Spirit, some hearing them mocked them and claimed they were drunk (Acts 2:13). Now I have been in contact with many inebriated people, and have never known someone fluent only in English to suddenly start blurting out German as if they were the Chancellor. I have had some foreign friends whose English mysteriously improves when they have a few drinks, and some friends who for some reason like to talk with a British accent afterwards. But never have I seen outright new language capabilities. As an aside, I also find Peter’s defense against these accusations markedly culturally appropriate - for the time. He basically states in Acts 2:15 that they couldn’t be drunk because it is too early in the day. If one used that defense today, I am certain a smart aleck in the crowd would shout out “Well, it’s 5 o’clock somewhere!”
The New Testament churches had simple names. These names were to the point and unmistakable. First was the Church in Acts, which was basically the Church. Later there was the Church in Ephesus, the Church in Smyrna, the Church in Sardis, the Church in Philadelphia and so on. It was where they were, and that was it. I think of all the church names, I would like mine to be simply called Church. Church may not be as fancy or attention getting as some other names, but it is simple and to the point. Some might question Church and ask it to be defined more specifically so that it could be categorized appropriately. “What exactly do you believe at Church?” they might say. “What are your customs? Your traditions? What do you dress like when you go there? Who gives the message? What does the person giving the message wear? Do you kneel? Do you sing? Do you sing contemporary or just classic hymns? How long are your services? Do you collect offerings? Do you have communion? Is it on the first Sunday or the fourth Sunday after the full moon and before a rooster has laid an egg on a pointed roof?”
All are good questions, I suppose. But at Church, we are simple and to the point. We know that The Bible shows Gods eternal plan, from the beginning of creation to the end of recorded time. It shows that Jesus was fully man and fully God, and that He is eternal. We know that Jesus is the only way for man to be saved in God’s eternal plan, and that in The End Christ is victorious. The Holy Spirit indwells the believer, and we can go directly to Christ with our prayers, petitions and praises. As for the other questions people will throw at Church, well, I just can’t answer those immediately. I’ll just have to wait until I have a catchy name.
Friday, August 6, 2010
Philemon
Driving a great distance to see an ailing family memeber leaves little time for one to find the funny. Such an activity can often lead to anxiety, distress and an overwhelming feeling of helplessness. However, on a recent trip, I was able to see God shine His funny.
Part of our family spent a week caring for a sick and injured family memeber. When it was apparent that the brother we had been visiting would be able to take care of himself again, we prepared to leave. On a lark and as an aside, I suggested to one of our traveling companions that he choose a portion of Philemon to write on our brothers dry erase board as an encouragement. Now Philemon isn't exactly the mighty Mississippi of books, and out of a mere 25 verses I wasn't wholly assurd that he could find anything relevant to our situation.
But like Thomas, my doubts were unfounded.
Verse 22 states "at the same time also prepare me a lodging, for I hope that through your prayers I will be given to you." Paul didn't write it to us, but it was most surprising to find such an appropriate and encouraging statement.
Such a small book, with such a big verse.
Now THAT'S funny.
Part of our family spent a week caring for a sick and injured family memeber. When it was apparent that the brother we had been visiting would be able to take care of himself again, we prepared to leave. On a lark and as an aside, I suggested to one of our traveling companions that he choose a portion of Philemon to write on our brothers dry erase board as an encouragement. Now Philemon isn't exactly the mighty Mississippi of books, and out of a mere 25 verses I wasn't wholly assurd that he could find anything relevant to our situation.
But like Thomas, my doubts were unfounded.
Verse 22 states "at the same time also prepare me a lodging, for I hope that through your prayers I will be given to you." Paul didn't write it to us, but it was most surprising to find such an appropriate and encouraging statement.
Such a small book, with such a big verse.
Now THAT'S funny.
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Genesis 17
People, particularly Christians, will often say that God has a sense of humor, or that Jesus would often laugh and joke with those whom he spent time. Yet all too regularly those same people will ignore the truth that God does have a sense of humor, and that Jesus expressed it, and focus on the stuffed shirt God who would singe the edges of one’s eyebrows with a lightning bolt should He see a smile cracked or a smirk released from one of His creation’s lips.
I see it much differently. I know full well that God has a sense of humor, and I can prove it. He created me – and let me get married! Should there be any greater proof of this sense of humor of the Almighty, then I surely haven’t seen it!
It is my intent in this blog is to show God’s sense of humor, and how we as His creations can see this sense of humor in biblical text as well as experiencing this sense of humor every day. My experience with the biblical text shows not only wailing, struggling and pain but also rejoicing, singing and yes, laughing.
Note: This is intended to be a family friendly blog. Basically this means that even your newborn can read it. And if your newborn can read it, all I have to say is what are you doing sitting at the computer? You should be out there showing that genius off! Anyway, I wanted to suggest that for this first entry, you scan it before letting anyone under the age of 17 or over the age of 80 with a heart condition read it, as it contains material that may be mature for some audiences.
It is sometimes hard not to look at portions of the Bible without taking into account our 21rst century perspective. It is with this in mind that I have always been fascinated by Genesis. In particular, I find that exploring Genesis 17 has the ability to put a smile on the face of even the most cynical.
For those of you without a bible handy (or who don’t simply want to run over to biblegateway.com and look it up!), Genesis 17 can be summed up as God explaining to the newly minted Abraham about the covenant He plans on setting up. God lays out what to Abraham must have seemed like an overly ambitious plan – for there to be a myriad of descendants from the nearly century old man, and for the land that these descendants would occupy and in which they would be able to worship God. Sarai would become Sarah, and Issac would be born, and that would pretty much be that.
Oh, and Abraham and all the males in his household (including servants) and every male child for generations to come at the age of eight days has to be circumcised.
Now, for Abraham, I’m sure this wasn’t really all that hard to deal with. Here he is, facedown in front of the one true God, who created all things that have ever existed and ever will exist, being given instructions on how his descendants will be vast and dwell in a still alien land and be God’s for all time. I’m sure Abraham had no question about it, and if he did he surely wasn’t going to verbalize it.
Abraham did, however, find time to laugh, though not for the one thing we might consider worth chuckling about. Instead of finding the method of covenant to be somewhat humorous to Abraham (or at least so hard to participate in that he HAD to laugh), Abraham laughs to God about the ludicrous notion of a couple whose ages total nearly two centuries bearing a son that was going to be the tip of the spear of great people.
Maybe it’s just me, but I’m still back at that whole circumcision thing perhaps causing problems with God’s perfect plan.
Nevertheless, God is able to ignore Abraham’s chuckles, finish what he was saying, and leave so the man can take care of business. Oh, and lest Abraham forget, he needs to go back and have that whole circumcision thing done to his entire household.
His ENTIRE household.
The biblical text doesn’t specify it, but I have to believe that on some level Abraham was going back and forth in his mind as to exactly how he was going to break the news to all these people. He had no doubt that he was going to follow through on God’s command, just as to the method by which he would let the others in on the news. Not only are there family members to consider, but also servants and foreigners, those that would have not necessarily been as easy to convince.
Perhaps Abraham though about opening with a joke, or an otherwise disarming statement. There might have been something along the lines of “a goat, a mule and a sheep walk into a stable”, or “talked to God earlier, you’ll NEVER guess what He asked us to do” or even “Hey guys, good news is we’re not going to die…”
Now imagine being on the receiving end of that news. Here comes Abraham back from his time with God, and he gathers all the men together. There were all the servants, family members and even perhaps those that had married into the family, standing around Abraham as he begins talking.
Then he finishes, and all the men look at each other…
Wait. What?
Hit hardest with the news was probably Ishmael. Poor Ishmael. He’s The Son at the moment, and he’s pretty much out of luck when it comes to this request. Not only did his dad ask him to do this, but God commanded it as well! His father and The Father. If you’re Ishmael in this situation, you’re pretty much locked into anything they said at that point.
What about the servants? They probably thought to themselves “maybe I wasn’t doing as good of a job as I had thought out in the fields or with the animals. But isn’t there some sort of three strike policy in this place? A verbal warning, a written warning maybe, then if I don’t shape up you can drop the hammer? Tell me again, which way is it to human resources?”
And if there were men who married into the family, you have got to believe that perhaps they were looking over at their wives and mouthing the words “Did you know anything about this? Is this why he was so eager to let me marry you?” I myself love and respect my father-in-law, and would do just about anything for him. But such a request would undoubtedly take me several days to mentally process, and an affirmative answer would be an unlikely result. Like Abraham, my father-in-law works outside a lot in hot, humid and sunny weather. I would suggest to him that maybe this day was a little too sunny.
But not just the adult men were affected, but so was any male child at least eight days old, and in turn this affected their mothers. Many mothers can be very protective of their young children. It’s hard enough for me to offer the children of my friends a piece of candy or a sweet treat. I’ll often get shooed away with the adminiton that little Johnny or Mikey can’t have the candy or sweet. “He does not need that!” they will say, with a mixture of indignance and shock that should be reserved for a time that I suggest little Johnny or Mikey play with the freshly sharpened bayonet on the end of my working, loaded and cocked rifle. Now imagine suggesting to that same mother that we try this little procedure that up until this moment in history our people haven’t done. Oh, and it’s not my idea, it’s God’s. You might be lucky to escape with you life.
The text does not suggest that there was ever a disagreement or question about this proposal among any in the household of Abraham. In fact, we know that everyone got it done – from 99 year old Abraham to 13 year old Ishmael to the lowliest of servants – within the year, and probably a lot sooner than that. Which puts a whole new spin on Larry the Cable Guy’s catchphrase “Git-R-Done”. But that’s an article for another day.
Abraham and Ishmael even had it done on the same day. Heck of a father-son activity if I do say so myself. Personally, I would take playing catch or working on the car together over that. Maybe even shoeing the camels or a hike into the hills with dear old daddy Abraham would have been preferable. I do not know the specific numbers, but I would think this puts Abraham and Ishmael in an elite group through the annals of time of fathers and sons who did this particular activity on the same day. Here I am thinking that it is amazing when a father and son play on a major league baseball field at the same time, like Ken Griffey and Ken Griffey, Jr, or when a father and son have both been President of the United States like George H. W. Bush and George W. Bush. But this takes the cake. And I do hope there was cake afterwards, because if something deserves cake, this certainly does.
Yet there is something much bigger at play here. Look at the way that Abraham and his household ultimately responded to God. If there was any dissension, it wasn’t worth noting by the author of Genesis. And the lack of dissension points to the greater truth of the power and majesty of God. When God asks something of you, even something that to us would seem so very difficult, delicate and perhaps unnecessary, you can trust that God’s plan is better than any of your fears or worries.
It isn’t written in the text, but I can imagine a separate paragraph preceeding Genesis 17:23 where God says to His people “I know this might be difficult, but it will be right. Throughout time, and up until the end of time, I am going to ask many people to do many difficult things, many of which will be harder than this. I will ask my people to do things that the World will look on as stupid, worthless, ignorant and foolish. But in the face of that all, my people will do it. They will do what the World calls stupid, worthless, ignorant and foolish because it is what I have asked them to do, and it is right. It is what they were created for, and they will praise me and I will bless them. Fear not, house of Abraham, for what you do this day will begin a series of events that will lead to the salvation of all mankind. I ask you to do this not because it is easy, but because it is hard, and because I am Holy. And I will not leave you nor will I forsake you.”
Imagining such a speech brings me chills Honestly, God could read me the phone book and it would bring me chills. But God didn’t need to give that speech for the people to follow. Abraham was a man of God, and his household knew that. When Abraham said that God told them to do this, they had the reverence and fear of the Lord, as well as the respect for Abraham, to know that what he said came from the voice of God. Still, God could have made that speech, and if He did, I can imagine the perfect ending.
“House of Abraham, what you do this day will begin a series of events that will lead to the salvation of all mankind. I ask you to do this not because it is easy, but because it is hard, and because I am Holy. And I will not leave you nor will I forsake you. For I am the Lord Almighty, creator of Heaven and Earth, the Lord of Majesty. If you think this is hard, just wait. Just wait to see what I ask my son to do.”
I see it much differently. I know full well that God has a sense of humor, and I can prove it. He created me – and let me get married! Should there be any greater proof of this sense of humor of the Almighty, then I surely haven’t seen it!
It is my intent in this blog is to show God’s sense of humor, and how we as His creations can see this sense of humor in biblical text as well as experiencing this sense of humor every day. My experience with the biblical text shows not only wailing, struggling and pain but also rejoicing, singing and yes, laughing.
Note: This is intended to be a family friendly blog. Basically this means that even your newborn can read it. And if your newborn can read it, all I have to say is what are you doing sitting at the computer? You should be out there showing that genius off! Anyway, I wanted to suggest that for this first entry, you scan it before letting anyone under the age of 17 or over the age of 80 with a heart condition read it, as it contains material that may be mature for some audiences.
It is sometimes hard not to look at portions of the Bible without taking into account our 21rst century perspective. It is with this in mind that I have always been fascinated by Genesis. In particular, I find that exploring Genesis 17 has the ability to put a smile on the face of even the most cynical.
For those of you without a bible handy (or who don’t simply want to run over to biblegateway.com and look it up!), Genesis 17 can be summed up as God explaining to the newly minted Abraham about the covenant He plans on setting up. God lays out what to Abraham must have seemed like an overly ambitious plan – for there to be a myriad of descendants from the nearly century old man, and for the land that these descendants would occupy and in which they would be able to worship God. Sarai would become Sarah, and Issac would be born, and that would pretty much be that.
Oh, and Abraham and all the males in his household (including servants) and every male child for generations to come at the age of eight days has to be circumcised.
Now, for Abraham, I’m sure this wasn’t really all that hard to deal with. Here he is, facedown in front of the one true God, who created all things that have ever existed and ever will exist, being given instructions on how his descendants will be vast and dwell in a still alien land and be God’s for all time. I’m sure Abraham had no question about it, and if he did he surely wasn’t going to verbalize it.
Abraham did, however, find time to laugh, though not for the one thing we might consider worth chuckling about. Instead of finding the method of covenant to be somewhat humorous to Abraham (or at least so hard to participate in that he HAD to laugh), Abraham laughs to God about the ludicrous notion of a couple whose ages total nearly two centuries bearing a son that was going to be the tip of the spear of great people.
Maybe it’s just me, but I’m still back at that whole circumcision thing perhaps causing problems with God’s perfect plan.
Nevertheless, God is able to ignore Abraham’s chuckles, finish what he was saying, and leave so the man can take care of business. Oh, and lest Abraham forget, he needs to go back and have that whole circumcision thing done to his entire household.
His ENTIRE household.
The biblical text doesn’t specify it, but I have to believe that on some level Abraham was going back and forth in his mind as to exactly how he was going to break the news to all these people. He had no doubt that he was going to follow through on God’s command, just as to the method by which he would let the others in on the news. Not only are there family members to consider, but also servants and foreigners, those that would have not necessarily been as easy to convince.
Perhaps Abraham though about opening with a joke, or an otherwise disarming statement. There might have been something along the lines of “a goat, a mule and a sheep walk into a stable”, or “talked to God earlier, you’ll NEVER guess what He asked us to do” or even “Hey guys, good news is we’re not going to die…”
Now imagine being on the receiving end of that news. Here comes Abraham back from his time with God, and he gathers all the men together. There were all the servants, family members and even perhaps those that had married into the family, standing around Abraham as he begins talking.
Then he finishes, and all the men look at each other…
Wait. What?
Hit hardest with the news was probably Ishmael. Poor Ishmael. He’s The Son at the moment, and he’s pretty much out of luck when it comes to this request. Not only did his dad ask him to do this, but God commanded it as well! His father and The Father. If you’re Ishmael in this situation, you’re pretty much locked into anything they said at that point.
What about the servants? They probably thought to themselves “maybe I wasn’t doing as good of a job as I had thought out in the fields or with the animals. But isn’t there some sort of three strike policy in this place? A verbal warning, a written warning maybe, then if I don’t shape up you can drop the hammer? Tell me again, which way is it to human resources?”
And if there were men who married into the family, you have got to believe that perhaps they were looking over at their wives and mouthing the words “Did you know anything about this? Is this why he was so eager to let me marry you?” I myself love and respect my father-in-law, and would do just about anything for him. But such a request would undoubtedly take me several days to mentally process, and an affirmative answer would be an unlikely result. Like Abraham, my father-in-law works outside a lot in hot, humid and sunny weather. I would suggest to him that maybe this day was a little too sunny.
But not just the adult men were affected, but so was any male child at least eight days old, and in turn this affected their mothers. Many mothers can be very protective of their young children. It’s hard enough for me to offer the children of my friends a piece of candy or a sweet treat. I’ll often get shooed away with the adminiton that little Johnny or Mikey can’t have the candy or sweet. “He does not need that!” they will say, with a mixture of indignance and shock that should be reserved for a time that I suggest little Johnny or Mikey play with the freshly sharpened bayonet on the end of my working, loaded and cocked rifle. Now imagine suggesting to that same mother that we try this little procedure that up until this moment in history our people haven’t done. Oh, and it’s not my idea, it’s God’s. You might be lucky to escape with you life.
The text does not suggest that there was ever a disagreement or question about this proposal among any in the household of Abraham. In fact, we know that everyone got it done – from 99 year old Abraham to 13 year old Ishmael to the lowliest of servants – within the year, and probably a lot sooner than that. Which puts a whole new spin on Larry the Cable Guy’s catchphrase “Git-R-Done”. But that’s an article for another day.
Abraham and Ishmael even had it done on the same day. Heck of a father-son activity if I do say so myself. Personally, I would take playing catch or working on the car together over that. Maybe even shoeing the camels or a hike into the hills with dear old daddy Abraham would have been preferable. I do not know the specific numbers, but I would think this puts Abraham and Ishmael in an elite group through the annals of time of fathers and sons who did this particular activity on the same day. Here I am thinking that it is amazing when a father and son play on a major league baseball field at the same time, like Ken Griffey and Ken Griffey, Jr, or when a father and son have both been President of the United States like George H. W. Bush and George W. Bush. But this takes the cake. And I do hope there was cake afterwards, because if something deserves cake, this certainly does.
Yet there is something much bigger at play here. Look at the way that Abraham and his household ultimately responded to God. If there was any dissension, it wasn’t worth noting by the author of Genesis. And the lack of dissension points to the greater truth of the power and majesty of God. When God asks something of you, even something that to us would seem so very difficult, delicate and perhaps unnecessary, you can trust that God’s plan is better than any of your fears or worries.
It isn’t written in the text, but I can imagine a separate paragraph preceeding Genesis 17:23 where God says to His people “I know this might be difficult, but it will be right. Throughout time, and up until the end of time, I am going to ask many people to do many difficult things, many of which will be harder than this. I will ask my people to do things that the World will look on as stupid, worthless, ignorant and foolish. But in the face of that all, my people will do it. They will do what the World calls stupid, worthless, ignorant and foolish because it is what I have asked them to do, and it is right. It is what they were created for, and they will praise me and I will bless them. Fear not, house of Abraham, for what you do this day will begin a series of events that will lead to the salvation of all mankind. I ask you to do this not because it is easy, but because it is hard, and because I am Holy. And I will not leave you nor will I forsake you.”
Imagining such a speech brings me chills Honestly, God could read me the phone book and it would bring me chills. But God didn’t need to give that speech for the people to follow. Abraham was a man of God, and his household knew that. When Abraham said that God told them to do this, they had the reverence and fear of the Lord, as well as the respect for Abraham, to know that what he said came from the voice of God. Still, God could have made that speech, and if He did, I can imagine the perfect ending.
“House of Abraham, what you do this day will begin a series of events that will lead to the salvation of all mankind. I ask you to do this not because it is easy, but because it is hard, and because I am Holy. And I will not leave you nor will I forsake you. For I am the Lord Almighty, creator of Heaven and Earth, the Lord of Majesty. If you think this is hard, just wait. Just wait to see what I ask my son to do.”
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Welcome to iWitness Views
Welcome, friends, to iWitness Views. I am your host, Jason, and hope that over the coming years you will be blessed, intrigued and perhaps at time beguiled by what God lays forth through me on these pages. It will hopefully make you laugh and think. Just don't go swimming until 30 minutes after reading, or you might cramp up.
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